Shake Some Action

I am restless these days. Maybe it is this last bit of winter but I can’t sit still in my life right now. Pilates was cancelled yesterday so there goes one of my ways to take my mind off things. Last night I didn’t even want to eat anything I had at home so stopped by N. 3rd to get a beet and goat cheese salad and although it's a favorite of mine it just didn’t do the trick either. So, I drove up to the NE Philly to hang out with my dad at the hospital. He looks great. Seriously, he has not looked this good in years. Quadruple bypass surgery really agrees with him. We shoot the shit and watch a shot put competition on one of the ESPN channels until visiting hours are over and then I head on back home.

Yet, I don’t feel like going home. I drive up Spring Garden to TLA to pick out some movies. I do get a little shot of adrenaline when the movie buffs behind the counter can’t identify the “movie where Warren Beatty plays a dead football player” for some old guy and I can (Heaven Can Wait). I get The King of Comedy, Marie Antoinette, and a documentary about some old German born actress who went crazy, Frances Farmer style.

Its only 9:00PM when I stop into the New Acropolis Diner on Girard, settle into a booth and pick a pie to match my mood. I feel like being by myself but don't want to be alone. I try to get through the latest Paris Review that I carry around with me that I have accepted I will never finish. When I bought it I really thought I wanted to get to the bottom of that whole JT Leroy thing. Guess not. Gazing out the window I poke at my slice of pie, drink my tea and try to think of something wrong or missing in my life. Nothin. I think there is a Sex in the City episode about this. My dad is doing great, work is good, my family and friends are fantastic to me, I fill every hour of everyday, I have things to look forward to, but I just have this feeling like something is missing. This need for something new isn’t like way I felt my last few months at Villanova where I would find myself in front of the full length mirror in my dorm, rimming my eyes with kohl liner while singing the Replacement’s “Unsatisfied” along with Paul Westerberg over and over. That time I dropped out and moved far away. Can’t do that this time.

Maybe I need a new hobby. Suggestions anyone?